I’m often encouraging my clients to do things that are a bit scary or out of their comfort zone, in order to help them achieve the goal or feeling they want to create. We all get stuck in ruts, doing things and thinking the same way day after day until something causes us to change. Sometimes we initiate the change because we realize the way we’ve been doing things is no longer working for us. And other times we choose to do something different just to shake things up a bit!
As a Martha Beck certified master life coach, I strive to work and live in accordance with the core values from Martha. The first one is “Live it to give it.” To me, this means using the tools and methods I recommend to my clients on my own challenges and areas I want to improve.
I recently did a big shake up, doing something I’ve never done before: stand-up comedy. A friend of mine provided the opportunity and encouragement, renting a club for an evening and inviting me to do a sketch. I knew I had some funny material from some really bad dates (which I find make great stories!), but I had never done stand-up. I’m not one for tons of research, but I watched some videos of my favorite comedians and noticed how they put things together. The set up, the timing, the punch line, and of course, the delivery, are each critical. I wrote out my ideas, and I read through them to three different friends, making adjustments each time after I saw where the stories lagged or where people laughed or didn’t.
I was SO NERVOUS! I did what I could to make it easier on myself: In addition to my research and practice, I had written out a couple of note cards with key phrases to remind me of each story and joke, so I didn’t put the extra pressure of memorizing it on myself. I wore a black top purposefully, in case I sweated profusely due to nerves. And I invited a couple of friends for support.
As with most things, I comfort myself in what might seem like a strange way. I imagine the worst that could happen, and get my brain thinking through how I would survive or cope with that. For this particular scenario, I imagined 1) they might not laugh, 2) I could get booed off the stage, 3) I could offend someone who doesn’t like my style of humor, 4) I would embarrass myself. Actually thinking through these makes it seem less scary to me. It’s something about putting words to the fear that makes it seem less daunting or all-consuming. I decided I could live through any of these worst-case scenarios – just a bit of a bruised ego to risk – and with all the preparation behind me, the only thing left to do was leap.
Last Saturday, it was show time.
I’m thrilled to say it went well. (You can watch it here. Note: Does include some profanity, so not for children.) And as I left the stage to applause and laughter, I experienced a massive adrenalin rush. It was incredible, and although my hands were shaking more than I’ve ever seen, it felt better than any rollercoaster or other thrill ride I’ve experienced.
There’s something about trying something new, pushing yourself to the edge, risking a bit, that has incredible rewards. Regardless of the outcome, you learn something from the experience.
What has life been tempting you to do differently? What small, or large, risk can you take today towards living the life you want?
What a great routine! I tried to comment on You Tube but they wanted all sorts of info from me…. I had no doubt that your material would be great, but truly your performance was as well! If I didn’t know you had never done that before, I wouldn’t know by watching it.
You are a natural performer – it clearly comes from your heart 🙂
Thanks for the reminder that not only do we need to step out of our comfort zones sometimes, but we also need to laugh at ourselves and with ourselves through all of our stories.
🙂 Jen
Thank you, Jen! 🙂