Over coffee with a friend, I encourage her to claim what she wants, to state it aloud, and as I’m saying it, I recognize the irony as I realize this is EXACTLY what I have been not doing for myself. Why can’t I claim what I want for myself?
Perhaps it’s a strange attempt at protection – if I don’t admit what I want, I won’t be so disappointed when in doesn’t happen.
Or maybe it’s that if I don’t say it out loud, no one will know when I fail to get it, compounding the disappointment.
Or it could be that I just don’t believe I deserve what I want. That it only happens for other people, those who work hard or are better people or more enlightened or always do what’s right.
As I put it down on paper, I can see how silly this reasoning is. In my mind, it seems completely logical. My mind tells me not to claim what I want, and by following its reasoning, I stay completely stuck in ways of thinking and doing that keep me from EVER getting what I want.
How can I possibly achieve or receive what I want if I don’t ask for it?
And I know I must ask and release my attachment to it. This is tricky for me sometimes, and probably part of the reason my mind twists itself up in not stating what I want. Because if you ask the Universe in a state of “I NEED this,” that grasping energy repels what you want, just like a desperate lover can repel the person they want to connect with.
By the grace of a friend who lent me a book, I found this prayer by Tosha Silver: “Let what wants to come, come. Let what wants to go, go. If it is mine, it will stay. If not, something better will replace it.”
I truly believe holding on to something that wants to go is not only futile but also keeps that “something better” from getting to you. We must create a vacuum to allow the space for that better thing to come in.
Today, I am going to claim one thing that I want, stating it in the present tense as if it is true. I’m going to write it on a slip of paper and burn it, letting it go with this prayer – Let what wants to come, come. Let what wants to go, go. If it is mine, it will stay. If not, something better will replace it. – knowing that I am always taken care of and that the Universe often has better ideas than I do about how to fulfill my wants.
